The Anti Chidlhood Obesity Plan

Two years ago we had a major problem boiling at the Muir house. Actually, we were in a hotel in Phoenix when I realized that my 9 year old son who had just finished the third grade had hit 130 pounds! We were on a vacation so I wasn't monitoring him very well, but fortunately the Gainey Suites in Scottsdale had a scale. Things had been getting out of control for a while but it was time that I turned my attention to the problem at hand.

There is nothing like being hit with a number to make you take stock of the situation. I could see the writing on the wall if we didn't work this problem out. Joe would keep gaining weight without much height for the next three years. I have other sons so I know how they grow. It is pretty normal for a kid to chunk up a bit before the big growth spurt. But if the weight gain is too great, the kid will never grow tall enough to make a good height/weight ratio. There are a lot of health problems associated with childhood obesity but thankfully, Joe wasn't having those problems yet.

So what is so bad about being a fat kid? I am sorry to inform the general public of this sad fact that I have learned by working with cub scouts and boy scouts for the past 21 years, but let me tell you, kids are mean! They are especially mean to fat kids. We can all talk talk talk about how kids shouldn't bully, but they still do. Mean kids are only surpassed in being mean and insulting by adults. There is almost always an assumption that a fat kid is lazy, stupid, and emotionally unstable. Even with all of this I know fat kids who have great personalities and are able to overcome the constant barrage of unkindness and end up being popular, wonderful, teens and adults. But that is the exception, not the rule. I think it is easier to help a kid with his diet and exercise than to train a kid how to ignore constant attacks on his body image.

What have I done to help Joe? I came up with a plan that included exercise and better eating. I also try to help him with his body image by teaching him how to respond to kids who say rude things about his weight.

The first summer, I started a camp for Joe. Every morning I would pick up his friend Daniel and take them to the track. We worked on running a mile, sit-ups and push ups. I spent a lot of my time yelling semi-insulting, motivational encouragements. I would test progress every two weeks to see how we were doing. I took the kids to a water splash park after the exercise time as a reward. They didn't realize they were still exercising. I have to admit that by the end of the strength and conditioning camp Joe was not really happy with me. On the last day of camp I told the boys I would pay them $5.00 for each lap they completed without stopping. I pretty much knew I wouldn't owe any money, but they surprised me. Joe ran four laps in 12 minutes! Daniel was just excited about the money and continued until he ran 7 laps! The whole exercise thing wasn't lost on me either. I walked the track with them and worked on sit-ups and push ups myself. The next summer I signed Joe up for a track club with the city of Richardson. It was $40 for the whole summer and I thought it would be worth every penny. The coach worked with the kids on more than I could have done. They got to run relays and do drills and obstacle courses. I met some wonderful friends as we walked the track while our kids did their thing.

I started Joe in SVAA football this fall. That was a good choice for him. The coaches are always happy to see big kids coming and are pretty forgiving of their lack of athleticism if they have a kid who can block on the offensive line. You can teach a kid to run but you can't teach a kid to be big. I really think this helped Joe with the way he thought about his body. I know he could see himself doing more and more in football. He became interested in pro and college teams and learned the stats and stories of the good players.

Now Joe plays soccer or football-catch during recess. He used to just sit on the swings before the athlete in him was released. It was pretty hard at first because he was pretty slow at running at and not very gifted at sports. But practice makes perfect. He is doing better everyday. You would be surprised at how this helps with making friends. I hear a lot less meanness going on these days.

The most inspirational part of the new regime for me was to watch Shaq's Big Challenge. You can find it here at this web site:

http://abc.go.com/primetime/shaqsbigchallenge/index

In this show Shaquille O'Neil took several out of shape, overweight kids and worked with them on exercise, eating right and staying motivated. The one big thing that I noticed was that the kids who were successful did not have really nice understanding parents who would accept an excuse. The successful kids had more of the drill sergeant parents. I can really relate to this personality type. My father was in the Navy while I was growing up. Being demanding just comes easily to me.

This is another site I have found that I will try this summer. It is a challenge for the entire family from the Shaq Attack:

http://www.shaqsfamilychallenge.com/publicsite/index.aspx

The eating plan was another challenge. I didn't want to make an impossible diet that Joe couldn't follow and that I would also have trouble enforcing. Rather than counting calories, we set limits and goals. The first limit I set was fast food could only be one meal a week. I even limited it further. When we go out for our once a week fast food meal Joe can get a kids meal or he can have 1/2 of an adult meal or three items off of the value menu(those items are pretty small). A couple of other limits that I have formed a habit of is only having dessert once a week on Sunday. We drink 1% milk. I allow Joe to have soda only on fast food day. I keep the house free of snack food that is tempting to Joe. I do this for myself too. I try to offer milk at most meals. I put out smaller cups so that Joe doesn't try to drink a 20 oz glass of milk when a serving is 8 oz. Since I cook dinner I can control the menu. I wish I could say that we only eat low carb, high protein meals but that would be a lie. I do try to make about two or three suppers a week low carb and no one notices. But still we have lasagna an other family favorites. I just monitor that Joe gets a good serving. Joe has a small breakfast most mornings of cereal and milk. We really never had a problem with eating too much of those healthy, home made meals. The trouble with Joe was snacking and constant eating. To combat this we provide Joe with a variety of 100 calorie packs and snacks. Joe doesn't know that some of his packs have more than 100 calories. We just love Skinny Cow ice cream sandwiches and Healthy choice fudge bars. I call these part of his 100 calorie snack options. I allow him to have three 100 calorie snacks every day. He can choose what he wants and when he wants them, but it is a pretty long day when he has eaten all of his snacks by 10:00 AM. He has learned to stagger the snacks and to save one for after dinner so that he can have an ice cream sandwich. I try to keep Crystal Lite in the fridge so that there is a no cal drink available. I sometimes make sugar-free jello so that there is a snack option when all of the snacks are gone.

When he complains about starving and he has no snacks left and it is two hours until dinner I offer him fruits and vegetables. I know too much fruit can cause weight gain but it really doesn't matter. Joe never really wants that anyway. I just offer. If I determine that he is really in pain and can't wait, I will break down and give him and give him 1/2 of a peanut butter sandwich and a glass of milk. I am going to have to admit that I do something like this everyday for Joe's after school snack. When he comes home from school he is truly hungry. He is not eating for recreation. The 1/2 sandwich and milk satisfy his appetite with out raising his blood sugar levels like a snack would because of the proteins in the milk and peanut butter. At that point I know he can make it until dinner. A good protein rich snack keeps him from continuous snacking from the time he gets home from school until dinner which is the lifestyle he would lead without my guidance.

I really try to make fresh, good food with a lot of vegetables served in a variety of ways. I try to serve lean protein and I limit fried food. I use olive oil and coconut oil in my cooking. I try to limit the fend for yourself dinners for a variety of reasons. Families who eat dinner together tend to talk to each other and it is a great time to really listen and have the kids open to listening. Additionally, when I make dinner I can choose the menu.

The benefit for all of this effort has already paid off. I think Joe would like the benefit of loosing a bunch of weight and being the skinny kid at school, but that is not going to happen unless I lock him in a room, shove carrot sticks under the door and put cotton in my ears so that I can't hear his screams. The reality is that Joe has gone up and down in his weight very little over the past two years. He weighs 132 now and considering we started at 130 that is about what I was hoping for. I don't need for him to lose weight, I just wanted him to stay about the same until his height catches up with his weight. I would never be able to do this with out Joe's cooperation. I mentioned bullying earlier. I never encourage bullying but I get it. Sometimes it can motivate your child to make socially acceptable choices because the alternative is painful. I have mentioned in my blog before that I will ever be grateful to my 6th grade friends for teaching me the hygiene rules of daily bathing and wearing deodorant. These changes were so easy to make compared to the issues a chubby kid faces. But it seems that the effort is worth the reward! So how does Joe respond to those rude kids? He generally lets a teacher know about the attack. He also responds that he is working on it. As mentioned earlier, the taller Joe gets and the better his height/weight ratio become, the less abuse he has to deal with.

If you have made it this far I congratulate you on your attention span and your fortitude. I wish you luck if you ever face this challenge. I want you to know that if the Muir family can tackle this issue successfully then it has to be possible!