There is a Slight Chance I Might be Going to Hell

I wish I had thought of this title. I saw it when I was at Sams a few weeks ago while perusing the books. I did not buy the book yet but the title intrigues me. Just a few moments after seeing the title I saw Joey trying to take a ride on an electric wheelchair at the store. "Get off of that right now!" I yelled. "Megan used to do it," replied Joey. "Well, there is a slight chance Megan might be going to Hell," I said. Took the wind right out of his sails. What could he do but say there was no way his sister was going to hell. I did not say she was definitely going, just that there was a slight possibility she might be going.

You see, my kids have always tried to justify their bad behavior by saying, "You do it too, Mom," or "Dad does the same thing." Now I have the perfect come back. I suppose we could all try to be perfect examples, but Bob and I seem to be incapable of perfection, especially when our kids approach or are fully entrenched in teenage hood.

I think it is funny that Joey has now put our oldest daughter Megan on his justification list. This must mean that Saint Megan is an adult now. You go girl! Megan was guilty of using the electric wheelchairs at Walmart late at night when she was a junior or senior in high school. This may be the worst thing she has ever done in her life. Joey never saw her crime first hand but I guess he heard her freinds laughing about it. That was five or six years ago. So there you go, Megan is not so perfect either.

"Sticks and Stones, Love"

I just got back from a 4 day trip to help out with my mother who lives in Arkansas. She was recently put on hospice. She has a variety of health problems and has been knocking on Death's door for five years now. She has very little strength and I know my father is worn out from constant care. Well, the thing is, she only really wants him to help her out. Every time I would take a turn at trying to move her off or on the potty she would cry and yell for Daddy. This morning I was helping her and she started hollering that I had hurt her leg. I was really trying to be careful but this movement is awkward for a novice to nursing. When Deanna called to talk to her this morning I could not believe the conversation. "Blah jas dri cha(she is so weak that you just can not understand a word she is saying) twutr, BONNIE BROKE MY LEG LAST NIGHT, pon glut hurm...

Wow. We just could not slur that sentence.

In my defense, this knee had been previously injured and she was recovering. I think it is easier to re-injure than to initially injure. I think the hospice nurse gave her an extra painkiller today after I left.

But now that I will be remembered in the annals of family history as the daughter who broke her mother's leg. I better take advantage of this. Does anyone need someone taken care of? I'm the one. And just to warn all three of you out there who read my blog, I may not be the safest person to cross. You had better be careful around me.

The Best Cookie I Have Ever Eaten

Yesterday I got in a mood to bake. It is July in Texas so I must be experiencing some sort of chemical imbalance. The last time I got in this mood I had decided to make the Pillsbury Bakeoff recipe grand prize winning Double Delight Peanut Butter Cookies. I got out of the mood before I got around to making the cookie. But yesturday I actually carried through with it.

After studying the recipe I knew I needed to make some important changes. I added an ounce of melted unsweetened Bakers chocolate to the peanut butter/ powdered sugar portion of the recipe. I also made my own peanut cookie recipe up instead of buying the reccommended slice and bake. Other than that I followed the recipe. This is honestly the best cookie I have ever eaten. It is a cross between peanut butter criss cross cookies, snickerdoodles, and chocolate chip cookies. Just look up the real recipe on a search engine. There are multiple steps in this recipe but the end product is worth it. You can find the recipe at

www.pillsbury.com/recipe/showrecipe.aspx?rid=44842

I am about to send some to John in his package. I hope he can taste the secret ingredient of love.

Serenndipity at Target

Today I went to Target as I have decided to do every morning at 8 AM until I get Wii Fit. No Wii fit, but I noticed that patio furniture and decor had just gone on 75% off clearance. I have a couple of friends whose daughters are getting married soon so I picked up some unique things. I did get a gong. I know when I give Lindsey the gong she is going to say, "Sister Muir gave me a gong!" I just do not know what kind of inflection she will have in her voice. Actually, I got a gong for myself last year and I was really happy about it. It sits on my entry way table. I took it to a teacher appreciation luncheon as a decoration and it was a hit so I can't imagine why any new bride would not be thrilled to have a gong.

Another great find was a weather vane topped with a rooster. Who does not need a weather vane? Well, this might be a harder sell. I have never owned a weather vane and have managed to watch the news everyday to see the weather report.

I also got some new furniture for the front porch. I got the Sean Conway balcony table and two swivel rockers. They look really nice.

The morning at 4 different Targets was really a double serendipity. Joe found a pair of cammo Converse shoes on clearance and in his size. I am making him save them for the first day of school despite Joe's most ardent protest. Its summer in Texas. Sandals and crocs are all that's necessary, except for church.

Fourth of July Fun

I looked at a map of the area around Annapolis and decided back in May that we would drive across the bridge and through a Chesapeake Peninsula for a charming drive to The Virginia Beach area. If anyone is ever contemplating this drive, just say no and take the freeway. We went through little town after little town and speed trap after speed trap. Also, the per capita number of police in Virginia has got to be crazy. We honestly saw a police car every five miles or less through the entire state. We went to Hampton Roads and spent July 4th at Buckroe Beach. We stayed at The Embassy Suites. It was one of the nicest I've been to. Joey was a popular boy at the beach because he had two boogie boards. It was no surprise that he had several new best friends tagging along the whole day.

 

I must be crazy to post a picture of myself in a bathing suit so I ask you not to zoom in too closely. I put sunscreen everywhere except for my legs because they really needed some sun. As my good friend Laurie Whitworth says, "Brown fat looks better than white fat." So I ended up burning my thighs to the point that I have peeled four times from the same burn. There is not much skin left and what is left is dry and crinkly despite bloating the area with lotion.

 

Bob stayed in the shade and put on massive amounts of sunscreen. He has just never appreciated the virtue of a good peel.

 

On July 5th we stopped at Jamestown before we headed back to Dallas. I remember learning about Jamestown when I was in fifth grade and really wanting to see it. We went to the historic Jamestown which was the actual historic site. The man standing near Joey was an actor portraying John Rolfe, an English settler who married Pocahontas.

 

Joey was getting tired of being the sole subject of all of our pictures by this point. I loved the visit and had a great time. Joey was just getting tired of all that reading he was having to do. We decided to skip Jamestown Settlement which was a recreation of Jamestown because Bob and Joey were under the impression that they had had enough of a history lesson for one day. But I am really glad that I finally made the trip.

We're In The Navy Now

 

 

Annapolis

On July 2nd we dropped John off at the United States Naval Academy. His only regret was that he could not have started a month earlier. Bob, Megan, Joey and I spent a relaxing day touring the yard, shopping at the Midshipman Store, going on boats, dining at the Drydock Restaurant and watching the show put on by the detailers ordering the new plebes around. John, on the other hand, started his military indoctrination process at 8:30 am by getting a new haircut, a new wardrobe, and a new outlook. We got to talk to him for about thirty minutes that evening after the Plebes took the Oath of Induction. He seemed pretty beaten down. He said he felt as if he had been handed a voluminous book and the detailers expected him to have the whole thing memorized without giving him a chance to open the pages. I really had a hard time feeling sorry for him. The memory of his eyes rolling into his head almost every time I opened my mouth was way too fresh. I love him to death and I think he is Captain America but even the best teens are hard on their parents.

We have received a few letters from John and a phone call today. He is doing great, not homesick at all. He loves church. He thinks there are about a dozen LDS plebes. He is starting to memorize that big book. He joined the track team. He appreciates any mail that he has gotten. He asked for white chalk to quickly cover dirt spots on his uniforms. It must be hard to keep white uniforms clean when you aren't sitting perfectly still in a sterile room.

When we were watching the detailers put on a show by screaming at the plebes I mentioned to Megan that I wished I had verbally abused John a little more while he was at home so that he would feel more comfortable with his new reality. Megan assured me that when I get on a rampage I sound exactly like the detailers. That came as a surprise but I am glad I did my part. No wonder John may have been so anxious to leave home.