Do You get Lost?

Have you noticed there are two types of people in the world, those who get Lost and those who don't get Lost? The unfortunate truth is most of us who get Lost are married to those who don't get Lost.This puts a strain on the relationship, but I assume it will heal back up in June when the season is over. At least it has over the past 4 seasons. As for now, I am loving life because I look forward to a brand new episode every Wednesday night. I guess this qualifies me as the sad, pathetic loser who is obsessed with Lost, number 4 on David Letterman's Top Ten Signs you are obsessed with Lost. Check it out!

top ten signs lost - Live Search Video

This was filmed in November 2006 but I think it is still appropriate. Ask my niece, Rachael, and my children, and they will attest to the part about the hot poker. I am sorry guys. I just can't control myself. But obviously, I am not the only one.

The Freshman Fifteen

Hell has just frozen over! John Muir now has to watch what he eats. For any of you who know John, he has always been the skinniest kid in the world. I mean he could eat anything he wanted and still he would have to wear a belt to cinch up his 30" waist jeans. As a pole vaulter in junior high and high school the question was, " Which is the pole and which is the boy?"

It's not as if he looks like a fat guy now. If anything, he looks more normal. He called me a couple of weeks ago and asked what he should do for stretch marks. I told him that he should use some lotion with collagen or cocoa butter. But then I asked him why a skinny kid like him might be gaining weight so quickly as to get stretch marks. He told me he was eating his full meals at King Hall, the cafeteria at USNA and that he was having dessert 2 times a day except for about 4 times a week when he really liked the dessert and he would go around and get 15 desserts. This adds up to about 60 to 70 desserts a week! At home we have dessert about once a week on Sunday, unless it is some one's birthday or a special occasion.

When I was a college freshman I actually lost about 15 pounds. I have to admit I probably needed to lose 20 pounds. I went on a half diet. I went through the line at the Cannon Center and would get my tray of food. I carefully divided the food in half and salted the half I wasn't going to eat with so much salt that it was no longer consumable by a human. I figured the cafeteria was giving me the same amount of food that they were giving the guys and that I really only needed half of what the guys got. I only ate dessert once a week on Sunday. I drank skim milk...

But poor John has never had to worry about his weight except that he never weighed enough. He has lied about his weight but it is always saying that he weighs more than he really does. "Yeah, I weigh 155," he brags. So we bring out the scales and John weighs 148, fully clothed after drinking 1/2 gallon of chocolate milk, at 7:00 PM. I know the way I weigh myself is in the morning, before eating anything, after I have gone to the bathroom, without a stitch of clothing. And that weight is usually 5 to 10 pounds more than what is recorded on my driver's license.

But all good things must come to an end. This is a little funny because John thought he would never have to go through this human experience. He has been pretty harsh on those of us who have struggled with weight issues. Could I say this is his just desserts? John has decided to limit his desserts to 4 desserts a week. He has decided to eat a smaller breakfast 6 days a week instead of a huge breakfast everyday. And to top it all off he has decided to drink diet Dr Pepper instead of the full sugar soda he always wished I would buy.


John in skinnier days.



These pants were obviously way too big for this skinny boy.



Is the uniform putting weight on him or is he putting on weight in the uniform?

I'm a Targeteer

This morning I got a call a little after 7:00. It was Megan telling me that Home Design at Target had just gone down to 75% off. It was really nice getting the sale alert early. Thanks Megan and Chris. I went to see what I could find. I called Deanna at about 7:00 Mountain time to give her the heads-up on the big sale. This is what I found!


I bought these two silk florals for $4.98 each. I plan to give them to Joe's teachers for Teacher Appreciation week.


I love this vase. It has a wood grain look. It's cost was $7.50.


I bought this for $25.00 as a wedding gift for a friend's son who got married several months ago. I didn't go to the wedding reception because it conflicted with my mother's funeral. I had something else purchased but a family member mistakenly opened it so I had been on the look out for a great gift.


I found this queen sized electric blanket for $20. I am planning on giving this as a wedding gift to someone in the future.



This is just a little jar for the cub scouts to use to keep the gumballs we accumulate to track their Faith in God progress. I was only $2.50.



This is an onyx bathroom set for the master bath. The pieces varied in price from $5.00 to $7.50.



I have been following this skirt around since it was offered at full price. It was $6.75 today! I think a bright pink tshirt will look good with this. Any suggestions?



I bought this sheet set for $12.50 because I am planning to redo my king sized bed with something that will go with this color scheme. Unfortunately the comforter that I wanted was only 50% off and there were lots of them there so I bet in a few weeks I will find them at 75% off. I will have to do a post on it when I get the new set.



I found this monkey-pod serving tray for $12.50. I just fell in love with it. My father brought back a lot of these types of things when he was on board ship in the Navy traveling to the Philippines and Hong Kong.



This is the new laundry hamper for the master bathroom. It was $20.



This chest was $32.50. I am the room mom for Joe's class this year and one of my responsibilities is to put together an auction item or basket for the Spring Fling silent auction. We are either going to fill it with something or we are going to decoupage it for a memory chest. I am going to ask for contributions from the moms in the class to help cover the cost of the chest and its contents.



Lastly, I bought Joe a new hamper for $15.00. He complained that there was no basketball hoop on it but that is just the way it is.

This Is A Decision You Should Make Only Once

Last night when we were eating dinner Joe told us that when he went to choir practice after school he noticed that someone had a strong body odor problem. He was trying to determine which of the 5th or 6th graders was the offender when he realized it was him. "I didn't put on deodorant because I didn't think it was going to be warm, so I didn't think I would need it," he told us.

Bob, not willing to let a teaching opportunity pass said, "You know,I don't have to decide everyday whether I should wear deodorant. I made that decision a long time ago and I just wear deodorant everyday."

I thought this was pretty funny because this is the usual sermon that goes with the Word of Wisdom. The line is, "I don't have to decide from situation to situation whether I will drink, smoke, or use illegal drugs. I have already made the decision that I will not use those substances under any circumstances."

This morning when I reminded Joe to brush his teeth, comb his hair and put on deodorant he really did them. I can't say that he has made the decision to do these things on his own. He will learn by sad experience if he forgets again. I will continue to remind him, but I refuse to do the sniff test.

I Found my Thrill on Blueberry Hill

On Saturday I went to little Walmart to do my pre-sabbath shopping. I saw some wonderful looking blueberries for $2.49 for a pint. I thought of how much Bob likes blueberries and how we like to put fresh berries on top of sugar-free vanilla pudding as a guilt-free pleasure. I bought the berries and put them in my big fruit bowl that I keep on the kitchen island. They sat there safe and secure all day yesterday but this morning I guess Bob could not resist anymore so he popped the container open and ate a few for breakfast. Because they were open, I decided that I too should try a sample. By 5:00 PM all of the blueberries were gone! I am not quite sure what happened to them. I could swear that I only had a few each time I passed the island. They were so good. They were very sweet and had the full blueberry flavor with out that too-tart flavor you can get sometime. It was kind of like God had come up with the perfect little treat and they aren't even fattening! I had to go back to little Walmart and buy a new container so that we could top off the tapioca I had made for dessert. Bob noticed the new container and Bob and Joe tried to prevent me from eating anymore because they claimed I had already eaten more than my share. I just had to tell them how high blueberries are in antioxidants and that I was just trying to do my part to prevent cancer. Bob hid the blueberries, much like I have to hide candy from Joe.

I also have self-control issues when it comes to fresh peaches from my trees, fresh apricots from Deanna's trees, fresh citrus from Chris's trees, and fresh cherries from any tree.

The Recessionista's Guide to Value Valentine Cookies

 

Today while I was cleaning the kitchen, well, maybe that is a stretch. Today while I was clearing a space off of my kitchen counter so that I could make dinner, I found an unopened tin of Christmas butter cookies. I only had a Target popcorn and diet coke combo for lunch so I was pretty hungry. I opened the can and ate a cookie. It was wonderful. I don't think I ate one butter cookie over the Christmas holiday. I was about to eat a few more to make up for my Christmas deprivation when that little voice kicked in, "Hey, instead of eating all of these cookies, why don't you frost them and decorate them with Valentine sprinkles and take them to Cub scouts tonight." That is a great idea I thought. I had powdered sugar, butter, milk, and vanilla on hand. I had Valentine sprinkles that I bought after season last year at Target for 90% off, so I was prepared. I wondered how many I could eat and still have enough for all of the cubs. We have 20 cubs in the pack. I counted that I had 19 cookies left. Darn! It is February, and I can be almost certain that at least one Cub has the flu. That ended the binge. I know that even if 3 or 4 Cubs have the flu tonight, and that is a few too many to hope for, I will not get another cookie. We have a bunch of hungry male den leaders who will eat what the boys do not. I am begrudgingly grateful that I was prevented from going hog-wild over something so dumb as out of date cookies.

Superbowl Fireside

 

Joe was so excited to watch the Superbowl this year. He would have preferred to be cheering the Cowboys on but y'all saw how da'boys blew up and did not even make the playoffs. The contenders this year were the AZ Cardinals and the Pittsburgh Steelers. So Joe had a really hard time trying to decide which team he was going to cheer for. On the one hand, he wanted to be in solidarity with Chris Beatty, the really great brother in law who is from Arizona and loves the Cards and has been a devoted fan for about 20 years, most of which were losing seasons. But on the other hand, Joe's Peewee coach actually played as a third string quarterback about 15 years ago for the Steelers. All of Joe's friends were cheering for the Steelers. Joe decide to cheer for the Cards.

Having no appropriate licenced Cardinal apparel, he took a red t-shirt and used tape to write CARDINALS. He also used the tape to put the numbers 00 on the shirt. He found a red baseball hat and covered the Frisco Rough Riders logo with masking tape. He put the Cardinals logo on the hat too. He had to give back his football pants at the end of his season so he turned his pajama pants inside out and rolled them up to simulate football pants. He was all ready to watch the game.

I fixed up the appropriate football feast chicken wings, meatballs, jalapeno poppers, queso,3 types of chips, and cookies. In a desperate attempt a be a little healthier, I added Diet Pepsi and carrot sticks.

What was funny about watching Joe watch the game was how willing he was to take off his shirt and change his allegiance. He did this about 4 times during the game. He always put his homemade Cardinals shirt back on when there was a glimmer of hope. He ended the game wearing the Cardinal shirt and yelling at the TV that the refs were watching the game with eyes that were not as keen as his young eyes which would have DQ'd the last Steeler's TD because Holmes clearly had only one foot on the ground before he fell out of bounds.

I too was a disappointed. Most Dallasites were rooting for the Cards because now the Steelers hold the record for the most Superbowl victories, knocking Dallas off that perch and making it just a little harder for us to regain the title. All in all it was a great game. It seemed that most of the commentators were predicting a Steelers blowout. But what happened was a game that was exciting from beginning to end.

Before Joe went to school today I gave him a lesson in good sportsmanship. I gave him the script for when his friends say to him, "Ha, ha! The Steelers won!" He is to say, "The Steelers played a great game."


Joe just got home from school and I asked him if he had to take a lot of teasing today. He told me that most of the kids had changed their minds and were cheering for the Cards because their parents let them in on the fact that a Steeler's win would mean they have broken the Dallas Cowboys Record for Superbowl wins. So he didn't have to practice good sportsmanship after all.