How to Completely Ruin a Kid's Life in One Day

Every couple of months Joe and I have the same argument.  I always win.  It ends with a trip to Huey's for a haircut.  It is not that I need him to have short hair.  It is that I need for his hair to be well groomed.  I have this need for handsome young men who live in my house to have great haircuts.  So today Joe got his hair cut.  When the barber asked if everything was okay, Joe told him that the front needed to be a little shorter.  I was a little surprised by this but it was okay.  He left and seemed okay.  On the way home I stopped at 7-11 and tried to get him a Slurpee.  He refused to get out of the car because he looked so bad.

I headed over to Sam's to buy him some new Levis.  He has been complaining about the jeans I got him last winter for an entire year so I wanted him to come in, try them on, and decide if he liked them.  At Sam's I tried to get him out of the car again.  "No way, Mom.  I am not going anywhere looking like Spock."   I had to assure him that no teenagers ever go to Sam's.  Then, I had to threaten him by saying that he wasn't going to get any new pants this year if he did not go in and try them on.  Once in Sam's I had him try the Levis on over his athletic shorts.  It was all so humiliating.

I decided that since his day was completely ruined anyway, I would go ahead and get him his flu shot. How much more could any kid take?

Later in the day we went to Chilis and I insisted that he order something off of the children's menu.  From my point of view, the point of view that pays for the meal, he would be getting a free drink.  He is still twelve and is still eligible for the kids meal.  I would be giving him all of my french fries and half of my entree.  He would also eat at least half of the appetiser.  All of this generosity went over like a fart in church.  He truly believed that I had completely ruined his life.

Amazingly, the appetizer came and he calmed down.  He started eating his food and could not finish it all before he declared that he was too full to eat another bite.  He has two new pairs of pants that fit and that he likes.  He got home, washed and styled his hair and it looks great.  And he probably won't be getting the flu this year.